Beachfront Bliss

Finishing my shift, I drive along the oceanfront highway through little towns on my way home.
The water is so beautiful today, and the tide is high. I decide to pull in and watch for awhile.
I sit in my jazzy car blissing out. My eyes are closing.
*tap tap*

'Harm??!'
I look around.
'Good Morning! If you wanted to visit you only had to say so.'

Realising I am near to an old friends I wonder in that moment if I am awake or if I am slipping into a dream.
' Wake up!'

Now I am wide awake. Where did I pull into? Did I do this subconsciously or am I pulling in stuff from the ether. I know this little spot. Lifestyles of the richer than I'll ever be.
There is the Casa Mia beside me and my old friend before me. I am right outside his grounds.
Do I look like a stalker? He is looking in my window at me, puzzled.
' What are you doing? Wake up!'

'Sorry, really, I just wanted to watch the waves.'


He looks in the window at me. A sad look.
'I miss you an awful lot. I never see you. But I heard you have a boyfriend now.'

I am still half asleep and still wondering if I am going to wake up.

My old friend is a man I once dated for a short time.
He is almost 14 yrs older than I am.
He still works, in his consultancy, has no kids and two ex-wives. He is alot of fun, and a very agreeable companion and was thrilled to accompany me to events. This was tempered by his need to show off. I liked him right enough, but I did not like being a possession; being touted out for his old buddies. A big part of the relationship for him was to adorn me so others might adore me. He would tell me how I have the best personality of any woman (in a long long line of women) he ever met and by the way am I ever sexy. Flattering... but...

I never quite believed it was sustainable and so I did date him.
But not for long.
Being around obscenely rich people was fine.
What was not fine was that constant assessment.
He used to say to me: ' God they all want you. You're killing them.'

He actually cried when I told him I could not see myself in the role of girlfriend nor mistress nor wife nor anything really except past possible paramour.

'You are fond of me, I know that. In time that will grow to more.'
---- not good enough.

'Life can be made very easy for you.'
yeah yeah

'We could have a wonderful life.'
I already do.

'You would never have to work again.'
I love working.

'I could secure your future in case I went quickly.'
It is not this world I worry about.

So there he is knocking on my window.
'Good Morning! Wake up!'

I sit up and realise my motor is running and my windows are shut.
There is noone there. I really was asleep.
I shut the car off and get out. I have an amazing headache.
I walk down to the shoreline and stare out to the Islands.
My head is throbbing. I feel very strange. What made me pull in here of all places?

I walk back to my car slowly.
There he is.
Just walking along the Highway home. He has his dogs with him.

They recognise me before he does. He looks great, in walking shorts and a white T.
His hair is almost completely silver now and it looks great.
He is looking over at me ,looking over at him and then suddenly it clicks.

He does a little jig, he shouts and runs over.

'Jeez, this is so weird. I was just thinking about you! You have been on my mind all morning. How are you?'

I cant answer. He doesn't seem to mind and continues on.

'Heard you are seeing some guy. What does he have that I dont?'
He pretends to be kidding.

I burst into tears and give him a hug.
Now he looks concerned and confused.
'OH my darling kiddo! Do you want to come in for tea? What on earth is going on?'

I blame it on family crap make my apologies and get in my car.
This time I come home no stopping.
There is already a message on my machine I ignore.


Life is strange.
Dreams are stranger.
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