Days off

Hurrah for the red and white and red.

Another day off and this one a holiday to boot!
Time to chill.

Since my romantic plans fell through and my slightly romantic plans also, and heck, even my pleasantly enjoyable time with opposite gender plans were minimal but admittedly very pleasant, its back to swilling orc blood. Woo hoo.

It was party time in the olde town today and the parade was loaded with local celebs and fine folk from near and far. It always surprises me how many young families are in our area. And I don't know any of them :) That's what you get for hanging out with the seniors.

Fireworks tonight. I might even go see.
Another possibly romantic thing I can do alone. *yay*
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What is it about alcoholism that it has the throats of so many people? And what is it about drunks who think that mentioning bad behaviour is verboten? I had a brush with a boozer yesterday. It was ugly.
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My dear olde romantic disaster Kevin breezed back onto my contact list from Tasmania. He was on an army vessel doing IT stuff. It is always nice to hear good news from people. He seems to be thriving in his career with the US Army. I thought it was somewhat odd to think the Army has a vessel but it turned out it was one of those Catamarans New Zealand is famous for building. I looked at the ship on the Army's website and was awed. Wish my job took me to climes exotic on missions interesting. oh wait it does. The realm of the mind and heart is a journey I can trod fearlessly.

One of the best parts of being a compassionate person is how you got that compassion in the first place. It rarely is from living a pure simple life and being born intuitive and wise. If ever. Compassion is born of events etched into our psyches; events we never thought would be ours to claim. Glorious ineptitude. Sorrow unimagined. Joy unfettered. Ours to share. Ours to keep.

Compassion walks in the valleys of horror and sits in the theatre of despair where no visible exits exist. We live through and we live on.

There is no way to communicate visually how deep those valleys were or how dark the nights. Noone would believe it anyway. You can look perfectly respectable and still be a junkie. And there are many kinds of junkies.

Kevin is one of those people who also went down black roads. Some of them holding my hand. It is amazing we can speak to each other civilly let alone hold each other in love and respect for something that could be possible in another time, another shade.

Ah the past. I was loved once upon a time.
And beloved.

I kinda miss that more than I expected to. The bad part of opening Pandoras' box is you cannot take back what is unleashed. And I am very sad.

Once I was beloved of someone.
Now I am just a guide for others.
I really need to pray a whole lot more for a whole lot less.
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Thomas More noted that Christ was overwhelmed by sadness, fear, and weariness which only could be resisted through prayer as Our Lord constantly reminded the sleeping Apostles.