As more and more of my clients are in their 90s and continuing to live well, it is inevitable that as I get to know them better I really get to know them better.
People have always shared with me the most intimate of things, and as I get older I find I know more and more secret, and not so secret things.
There was the woman who was visiting her Mother and walked in on us chatting.
"Oh," I said, "You Mom was just telling me the name of the ship that brought her over from Scandanavia."
"Mom doesn't know that!"
Apparantly Mom had never told the daughter that, but it was there in her memory.
Things spill out at all sorts of times. One moment you are chatting about the weather and the next you are hearing about Uncle James who molested her at age 7 or Uncle Bill who taught her how to ride the bike before he went off to war and was killed, or Aunt Marg, the closet drinker. Everything!
This phenomema happens to movie actors as well. They are forced together for intense (but brief) months and form (artifical) intimacies that are unnaturally quick. Then they go on to the next film and another brief intense intimacy.
Makes a person rather fickle I think, ultimatly.
For me, it makes me unshockable.
I am disgustable, but truly unshockable.
Lately more and more of the 90 year old + clients are telling me about their tiredness. They really are tired. My very favourite glamourella caught me at the door of the apartment when I was there for someone else and that is exactly what she said. "I am just getting tired now."
Then she said:
"Can you imagine me in a few years? I'll be this way."
And she made the horizontal sign.
Will I be able to make light-hearted remarks when I am older?
I hope so.
I do not believe in my heart of hearts that I ever will get much older.